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Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal
Author: Christopher Moore
Publisher: Harper Paperbacks
Category: Book

List Price: $13.95
Buy Used: $6.74
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New (48) Used (35) from $6.74

Rating: 4.5 out of 5 stars 501 reviews
Sales Rank: 869

Media: Paperback
Edition: First Perennial
Number Of Items: 1
Pages: 444
Shipping Weight (lbs): 0.8
Dimensions (in): 7.8 x 5.3 x 0.8

ISBN: 0380813815
Dewey Decimal Number: 813.54
EAN: 9780380813810
ASIN: 0380813815

Publication Date: February 1, 2003
Availability: Usually ships in 1-2 business days

Also Available In:

  • Audio CD - Lamb CD: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal
  • Paperback - Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal
  • Paperback - Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal
  • Kindle Edition - Lamb
  • Audio Download - Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal (Unabridged)
  • Paperback - Lamb, The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal
  • Hardcover - Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal
  • Turtleback - Lamb: Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal
  • School & Library Binding - Lamb: The Gospel According To Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal

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Editorial Reviews:

Amazon.com Review
While the Bible may be the word of God, transcribed by divinely inspired men, it does not provide a full (or even partial) account of the life of Jesus Christ. Lucky for us that Christopher Moore presents a funny, lighthearted satire of the life of Christ--from his childhood days up to his crucifixion--in Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Christ's Childhood Pal. This clever novel is surely blasphemy to some, but to others it's a coming-of-age story of the highest order.

Joshua (a.k.a. Jesus) knows he is unique and quite alone in his calling, but what exactly does his Father want of him? Taking liberties with ancient history, Moore works up an adventure tale as Biff and Joshua seek out the three wise men so that Joshua can better understand what he is supposed to do as Messiah. Biff, a capable sinner, tags along and gives Joshua ample opportunities to know the failings and weaknesses of being truly human. With a wit similar to Douglas Adams, Moore pulls no punches: a young Biff has the hots for Joshua's mom, Mary, which doesn't amuse Josh much: "Don't let anyone ever tell you that the Prince of Peace never struck anyone." And the origin of the Easter Bunny is explained as a drunken Jesus gushes his affection for bunnies, declaring, "Henceforth and from now on, I decree that whenever something bad happens to me, there shall be bunnies around."

One small problem with the narrative is that Biff and Joshua often do not have distinct voices. A larger difficulty is that as the tone becomes more somber with Joshua's life drawing to its inevitable close, the one-liners, though not as numerous, seem forced. True to form, Lamb keeps the story of Joshua light, even after its darkest moments. --Michael Ferch

Product Description

The birth of Jesus has been well chronicled, as have his glorious teachings, acts, and divine sacrifice after his thirtieth birthday. But no one knows about the early life of the Son of God, the missing years -- except Biff, the Messiah's best bud, who has been resurrected to tell the story in the divinely hilarious yet heartfelt work "reminiscent of Vonnegut and Douglas Adams" (Philadelphia Inquirer).

Verily, the story Biff has to tell is a miraculous one, filled with remarkable journeys, magic, healings, kung fu, corpse reanimations, demons, and hot babes. Even the considerable wiles and devotion of the Savior's pal may not be enough to divert Joshua from his tragic destiny. But there's no one who loves Josh more -- except maybe "Maggie," Mary of Magdala -- and Biff isn't about to let his extraordinary pal suffer and ascend without a fight.




Customer Reviews:   Read 496 more reviews...

5 out of 5 stars The best book Ive read in months   November 25, 2008
I loved this book! Its very rare you find a book that makes you laugh outloud. It makes you think but does it in a way that makes you read it over and over. Ive bought 3 more copies as christmas gifts, its a must read for everyone!!


5 out of 5 stars Laugh Out Loud Reading!   November 24, 2008
Easily one of the most exceptional books I've ever had the pleasure of reading. I owned this several years ago during a period of time when I was managing a bookstore, and it came very highly recommended by several of my staff that I really felt knew my tastes and knew what they were talking about, and I have to admit, I was _not_ disappointed! Through a period of time and several moves later, I somehow managed to lose the book (or loan it out only to never see its return) so I have recently purchased it again on amazon (actually, purchased it twice, one for me and one for my roommate). I clearly remember this book as one of the first instances that I actually laughed so hard I had to put the book down for a minute! Up until "Lamb" I smirked while reading, I may have even giggled a bit, but this book actually made me laugh! Belly laugh! I'm not a religious person but "Lamb" doesn't cater to any particular readers knowledge on the subject matter, it's just really really funny! It's storytelling narrative style is universally hilarious. I highly highly recommend this as a great, fun read to anyone! Christopher Moore in general is a great place to visit. "A Dirty Job" was also an exceptional book!


5 out of 5 stars What did jesus do during those lost years???   November 17, 2008
This was very well read. The narrator kept my attention. I did have to listen to it twice because the wit and humor does get a little lost in the biblical "stuff". Speaking of biblical, if you are highly religious, you might find this a little offensive. But I think people are way too sensitive about their religion anyway. This is FUNNY. I totally want the book that looks like a black bound bible for my bookshelf. That would be awesome.

Back to the book... this is great. It fills in what the other books of the bible didn't tell us... told by Joshua's (LOL) best friend... none other than Biff. I love Biff. I love that his name is Biff. I just love so much about that that I cannot even begin to explain why.

Just read it. It's hilarious. Christopher Moore is one twisted dude. And well, I love that.



5 out of 5 stars Fantastic!   November 16, 2008
One of the best religious satires in modern media. Every bit as funny as the movie "Dogma" and twice as sarcastic. Loved it!


5 out of 5 stars Hylarious and moving story of Jesus   November 10, 2008
This is one great book, just freaking hilarious while also being pretty useful to me.

Lamb gives me context where I hadn't completely understood before.

Christopher tells the story of Christ from birth. While he talks about his life after he comes out and begins preaching openly, he focus much more on Christ's formative years, everything from an interest in sin to learning the ways of the Buddha.

This is, of course, a complete work of fiction. Everything is made of from the author's mind. While he stuck to historical documents to keep some of it accurate, he certainly stretched a lot to make the story fun and fill in gaps which no one knew about.

I can't really explain the book in one post, though I'm always happy to talk about it. Needless to say, I got to live alongside Jesus as he grew up and was shaped by the world around him. I really gained a deeper understanding of the place of Jews within Roman rule as well as what the heck the difference between a Pharisee and a Sadducee was.

The best quotes I got from the first reading of the book were.

Joshua's ministry was three years of preaching, sometimes three times a day, and although there were some high and low points, I could never remember the sermons word for word, but here's the gist of almost every sermon I heard Joshua give.

"You should be nice to people, even creeps.
And if you:
a) believed that Joshua was the Don of God (and)
b) he had come to save you from sin (and)
c) acknowledged the Holy Spirit within you (became as a little child, he would say) (and)
d) didn't blaspheme the Holy Ghost (see c),
then you would:
e) live forever
f) someplace nice
g) probably heaven.
However, if you:
h) sinned (and/or)
i) were a hypocrite (and/or)
j) valued things over people (and)
k) didn't do a, b, c, and d,
then you were:
l) fu***d

Awesome summation of Jesus' teachings. Oh yeah, did I mention there was some swearing?

Then there was this conversation between Biff and Maggie (Mary Magdalene)

"When we were in India, we saw a festival in the city of their goddess Kali. She's a goddess of destruction, Maggie. It was the bloodiest thing I've ever seen, thousands of animals slaughtered, hundreds of men beheaded. The whole world seemed slick with blood. Joshua and I saved some children from being flayed alive, but when it was over, Joshua kept saying, no more sacrifices. No more.

Maggie looked at me as if she expected more. So? It was horrible, what did you expect him to say?

He wasn't talking to me, Maggie. He was talking to God. And I don't think he was making a request.

Are you saying that he thinks his father wants to kill him for trying to change things, so he can't avoid it because it's the will of God?

No, I'm saying that he's going to allow himself to be killed to show his father that things need to be changed. He's not going to try to avoid it at all."

Another great conversation which helped me better see Jesus' relationship with His father.

Definitely pick this book up. It'll definitely ruffle some feathers with the stuff he made up, like Jesus learning the ways of the Buddha and such. It's a work of fiction, get over it.


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